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20.07.2016 Berlin

You have no idea how much I'm looking forward to studying in Korea. It's insane. I can't believe I've come this far. To even get accepted at one of the best schools in Korea is absolutely unbelievable.

To think I only applied to a single university because I figured if it wasn't this one, I'd simply choose another path. What other path was I even talking about?? Yikes. Thank god they accepted me and it all worked out OK. Of course, I have to move away from home now, and also simply just move out of my family's house for the first time. I'm sure having roommates and or living by myself will be fun. This is the start of becoming an adult, I guess. I'm going there so fucking soon and for so long as well.

Is this even real? I'm so freaking excited, it's crazy. Everything is falling into place!

15.08. 2016 Jakarta → Manila

As I was trying to slurp the chicken-flavored ramen noodles out of my cup as silently and cleanly as possible, I realized that I was the only person on this airplane who was awake.

It's so strange how, on an airplane filled with people, with your family seated in the row next to you, one can still feel so incredibly alone. On top of that, you're so far away from everything. My exact location, you ask? In the middle of the sky, somewhere on this earth.

I mean sure, the ramen noodles were absolutely delicious but they seemed almost like a consolation prize.

The entire airplane was as dark as the night sky outside with the exception of a single tiny light trying to hold its own in the midst of it all. That tiny light was the little bulb above my seat the stewardess had so kindly switched on because she had noticed me reading. It was currently 3:32 in the morning.

My sister, my mom, and my brother had all fallen asleep. On the two seats next to me rested a very friendly man in his mid-40s and a younger fellow who had tried to use the tray table during take-off (*scoffs* amateur).

The cup noodles stood almost empty in front of me on the table now. They seemed like the only company I had at that moment.

So many people in the world and not one is able to understand how you really feel. Frustrating, really.

© Sahriah Ingratubun 2023-01-29


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